Wednesday, August 27, 2008

the non-back-to-school jitters

for the past 2 days i've been extremely anxious. and i think i've finally put my finger on it - the seasons are changing, my sisters are going back to school, my friends are moving away to start various jobs all around the world, and yet i'm still here, living out of my parents basement, just waiting. waiting for my life to pick up again. to start work, to make some serious moulla, to move out. and while i've found some really interesting things to do in the interm, i can't help but feel like i'm missing out. as noted in yesterday's post, i like to keep busy. i seem to get really on edge whenever i'm not wrapped up in a whirlwind of work, social events, friends, family, ... and that's how i feel right now.

for one, i'm having a really tough time living at home. i've lived on my own for the past 4 years, and well, re-entry has been slightly trying at times. at first it was great - no rent (thank you parents!), free food (another thanks to the folks), great location. but i miss my old lifestyle terribly. and my mother gets on my nerves like no one else can. she's insanely irritable and snaps at everything. oh, i'm sure i do my share to provoke her. and while i'm also sure there are lots of things i can do to improve my living situation, right now i feel like playing the snotty 21-year-old card and blaming her for all my anxieties. and my lack of boyfriend. and for the 3 lbs. i still have to loose to make my labor day goal. and for the fact that my friends are all moving away. and... and... and... this isn't getting me anywhere. time for me to suck it up and quit being a princess. god, i'm sooo typical. argh!

alright, now that that annoying little rant is out of my system, time to move forward. it's that time of post again - action plan time. so here's how i'm going to handle my frustrations when i get home from work:
- work out (for my personal sanity)
- laundry
- clean bedroom (including move desk chair to basement)
- clean bathroom cabinets (get rid of old products, etc.)
- organize makeup (i'm a makeup junkie, and right now my little case is overflowing with products i haven't used in over a year - it's stressing me out)
- go to bed early

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